Soulmates...

I bet a million trillion dollars that you read the title of this post and thought I was going to be writing something about marriage and/or my undying love for DW.  You may have even gagged a little.  Ha!  Well, I'm not going to be writing about that...I'll just go ahead and get that out there.   But, I am thinking about a marriage, of sorts. 

 

You know how there are those times in your life when you know that you are supposed to do a certain thing or feel a certain way...or you know you should act or respond to someone in certain way?  And then there is the actual reality of taking this knowledge you have and putting it into play.  It feels like a much different animal...the knowing vs. the doing.  Come on, tell me that I'm not alone here in this struggle between knowing what's right and actually doing it sometimes? 

 

It plays out in different ways in my life all the time.  Every day, really, in some form or another.  In the past, when I was deep in the midst of my struggle with infertility, there were those moments when someone I knew announced their pregnancy.  My head (knowledge) knew that I needed to choose to be joyful for them...but actually choosing joy (an action) and feeling it was where the challenge occurred. 

 

This knowledge versus actions happens in other ways...some small, some big.  Oh let me not count the ways...for there are far too many to list.  I only own up to this because I think its important to acknowledge that, even though I want to be a better person and feel and act in a way that I think honors God, there are many momentary failures on any given day.  My flesh is prone to rising up and slapping me in the face. 

 

I'm still working through the book of James each morning - an awesome book but also intensely honest and convicting - and I'm now in Chapter 3, verse 13.  Today's verse was: 

 

"Who is wise and has understanding among you?" 

 

These two words, "wise" (or knowledge if you like that word better) and "understanding" are the soulmates I'm talking about.  Those two words are the equivalent of Biblical peanut butter and jelly...they are pretty decent by themselves but they belong together...and, bottom line, they are better together. 

 

Wisdom is factual information on "what to do" or "what not to do".  In general, information/knowledge.  But having information or knowledge doesn't mean that, just because you know it, you use the information.  I've been there.  Many, many a time.  I feel like people - even good or great people - think to themselves, "I know (head knowledge) this is a bad decision..." and yet find themselves doing "it" any way. 

 

Take, for example, a hypothetical situation.  You get a flirty text message from a married co-worker...and even though its flattering, you know you shouldn't respond.  You know what NOT to do.  Your head has knowledge.     

 

Understanding is the "why" that goes with knowledge.  You have to take the head knowledge that you have and apply it:

The following are the reasons WHY I can't answer that text message:

1) I can't answer it because it only takes one, tiny little cigarette butt to burn down an entire forest...and I'm standing here with a lit cigarette in my hand

2) I can't answer that text message because its one, tiny step toward creating "walls" and allowing deceit to make a "home" in my marriage

3) I can't respond because I made a commitement and this goes against what I believe about honoring my family

4) I can't answer it because if I were my spouse I would feel SO incredibly betrayed, etc...the list could go on. 

 

Wisdom: I know I should forgive that person for X because I would want to be forgiven if it were me

Understanding: I should - and will choose to - forgive them because Christ first forgave me for far worse.

 

Wisdom:  I know that I should not be jealous of so-and-so's elaborate name brand wardrobe but I am

Understanding: I am jealous because it makes me feel insecure and I am allowing things to determine my value

 

There are a million scenarios I could think of...a million opportunites to succeed each day and equal opportunities to fail. Recently, as I've been studying, there is a question I'm learning to ask myself every day and this verse in James just affirms it. 

"Now what?"    

How do knowledge and understanding change me?  change how I treat others?  change how I view and respond to life circumstances?  What do I do next with what I'm learning?

Well, I definitely don't see how I could say it any better than Beth Moore did in this study of James I'm doing.  "In any area of your walk of faith where you've accurately learned a "why" (even if the process was ugly), you've gained what the Bible calls understanding.  Wisdom and Understanding in the believer are as practical as they are beautiful."

Booyah.  Soulmates.  I also love that she mentions that the process to greater understanding about self and God can be "ugly" sometimes.  It makes me feel a sense of thankfulness that the past can be redeemed and a sense of hope that the future can be better.  Faith, like life, is a process...and, Lord, thank you SO much for calling me to go on this Journey.   

Now what?